I thought we were having a moment…you ruined it
sorry you’re too heavy to pick up
I HAD 3 PIECES OF CHEESECAKE AND ICE CREAM OH MY GOD
What a champ
YOU DONT UNDERSTAND IM LACTOSE INTOLERANT
my hand slipped
Welcome to America
Where you pay obscene amounts of money for education
This is basically what it’s like to be an adult.
Where the hell is this from?!
You’re kidding me?
Just imagine turning up to work
And knowing that it’s your job to slap someone with a fake cat paw
this oatmeal has god damn dinosaur eggs in it and then when you cook it THE DINOSAURS FUCKIN HATCH IM SO PUMPED
if you were a twin in ancient rome they would name the firstborn and then name the secondborn after the firstborn
if your older twin’s name was geminus, your name would be anti-geminus
that is the equivalent of naming your children steve and not steve
so what happened when triplets were born
Steve, Not Steve, Definitely Not Steve.